January 2nd, 1781

1780 drew to a close swiftly and without much rejoicing by myself. It was a troubled year and I pray that this one may be better, which is how I begin every year in truth. I was fortunate in that Christine came to visit and stayed a few days with me here at Sully. We ate and drank well and enjoyed all of the aesthetic pleasures that Paris affords. Her sister, lately married, is already expecting her first child, so she and I commiserated over our siblings' good fortunes.

No sooner had she departed than a letter arrived from my steward informing me that there is almost no money left to send unless I raise the rents of my tenants back in Auvergne. This I am most unwilling to do, but I must or else find a charge at court quickly, which is difficult to do without the money to purchase one. I could ask F-, but that I am even more unwilling to do. I feel myself slipping into his power already and a sizeable loan would only strengthen the impression. Of course I could ask Thierry, and he would give it to me if he were able, especially as I have done as much for him many times over the years, but I am not sure that he could do so, and he will stretch himself beyond his means to help me. I go tomorrow to sell some jewelry and see if that will be enough for now.

I have promised myself that this year I will be more frugal. I will sell l'Hotel de Sully in the spring and take a more modest house, perhaps outside of the city, in the autumn. I must sell at least one of my estates in Auvergne, but I dare not rid myself of Lespinasse whilst Maman lives, for it was her childhood home. Still, soon I think decisions must be made, and I will have to make excuses for not joining in many of the frivolities of my friends. It would be good to relieve myself of these debts before the wedding. I am determined, all shall be well.

Olympe, Comtesse