I try to be understanding, and I know that I am her only daughter, so she must have been dreaming of this for so long; far longer, in fact, than most since I am old to be getting married for the first time. Still, it galls me that she takes liberties with sending my servants on errands without discussing the choices with me first.
I must endure it, I suppose. I should prefer something small and private, but both F-'s family and mine would never allow it. It still feels like a dream to me, unreal, as if I will wake up any moment to find myself younger, with R- alive and T- by my side, as in days past.