It has taken me until today, really, to feel better. The other guests were kind enough to cut flowers for me from the gardens and so my room is quite pleasant and full of color. I was feeling sufficiently well enough to leave my room, but then lapsed into a worse state than before. My head and stomach hurt so, it was hard to sleep. Today I am weak, but well enough to dress and take a small turn in the gardens.
I have accomplished little other than to rest in the past few days, and received letters from T-, my steward and one rather terse one from my mother. She would like me to expend my money and influence to aid my brother, Andre, to make his fortune in the world. I continue to say that not only can I not, but I would not, for he is as likely to squander it as any man I have ever met. If he showed any true inclination to apply himself to a profession I would be only too happy to assist him, but as it is, I do not trust him to know his own course.
I will answer Christine’s latest letter soon, and press Mme le Sang-Boeuf for a decent residence while I am in Paris. This must all be resolved soon. I do hope that T’s prayers for a commission are soon answered as well.
I am tired and must rest again. If fervent prayer has any effect then all will be right very soon.
4 days ago